Finding Sandy
by YellowRubberDuckie
Summary: When romance buds between Sandy Cheeks and Sheldon Plankton, Plankton undertakes plot points reminicent of The Little Mermaid. Now finished. Look for the sequel You're Beautiful coming soon!
1. Chapter 1

"I had a wonderful time tonight, Larry," said Sandy Cheeks, the bright bubbly squirrel. She had just come home with Larry after a date. She was dressed in a skintight, revealing red dress, as well as her usual air helmet.

"I did too, Sandy." Larry the Lobster, Bikini Bottom's resident lifeguard and strongman was standing with Sandy in front of his apartment building. "So, I guess you're coming up?"

"What?"

"You know, get a little workout between the sheets, if you catch my drift."

"Larry Lobster, what the hell kinda girl do you think I am?"

"One who's absolutely enamoured with me." He kissed his bicep.

"Good-bye, Larry." Sandy turned around on her heel and stamped off, upset.

"I'm your ride home!"

"I'll WALK, thank you very much!"

Sandy stomped off, quite understandably upset. "Thinks I'll do that on a first date. Why, if he tried that in Texas, my family would have him for barbecque! Stupid arthropod."

Meanwhile, Sheldon Plankton, proprietor of the Chum Bucket, was having romantic problems of his own. "What do you MEAN you're leaving me, Karen?"

"Well, I know that, since WIFE is just the name of my program, you've been cheating on me."

"It's not cheating. I built you."

"It's cheating. I'm leaving you. Good-bye."

"Wait," Plankton said, obviously confused. "How?"

"Internet." And with that, Karen's program was gone for good out of Plankton's life.

Confused, he wandered out into the streets of Bikini Bottom. "How could she leave me?"

Sandy coincidentally was walking down the same street. "How could he proposition me?"

"I just want someone to spend my life with!"

Plankton looked up at Sandy, as they had said the preceding simultaneously. "Mammal."

"Critter."

They walked along in silence. "What happened to you?" Plankton asked.

"I learned that Larry's just into one thing, and it ain't stickers."

"Tough luck."

"You?"

"Karen, the computer I programmed to be my wife, left me for the Internet."

"That sucks."

Again, they walked in silence. "You know, you've dated nearly every guy in Bikini Bottom."

"That's true. Spongebob, Larry, Don, even Mr. Krabs took me to the dollar theater."

"Why didn't we ever get together?"

"Because you're a little critter."

Plankton laughed. "That's true."

She looked at him. "You wanna go out sometime? Maybe get a drink."

"You're on, Mammal."

"If we're gonna do this, I'm Sandy."

"Sheldon."

"Nice to meet you, Sheldon. Tomorrow at 8?"

"You're on."

And, for once, Sandy and Plankton returned to their respective homes happier than when they left.


	2. Chapter 2

Spongebob hid behind a coral near Sandy's treedome. "Teeheeheeheehee. I'll get the jump on Sandy THIS time..."

Sandy stepped out of the treedome wearing stylish pants and a t-shirt. Spongebob made his KA-RA-TAY battle cry and lept through the water, stopping just short of Sandy.

"Not now, Spongebob, I'm on a date."

"What?"

"I'm headed down to the new bar down the street from the Krusty Krab. Can't mess up my fur before that."

"Larry?"

"Spongebob, Larry and I broke up."

Spongebob imagined Sandy cracking one of Larry's claws off and shuddered. "Who then?"

"Sheldon."

"Oh." Spongebob smiled, blissfully unawares of who exactly Sheldon was. "Have fun!"

"You too. Maybe you should practice some so's you can sneak up on me better."

Plankton looked up at the clock. "She should be here by now..."

The bartender looked down at him. "What the hell are you?"

"I'm Mickey Mouse. What do you think I am? I'm a Plankton."

Sandy walked up to the bar. "Sorry I'm late, Sheldon."

"It's quite allright. I was explaining to this imbicile what a plankton is."

"Plankton, from the Greek for 'drifter.'"

"Exactly. My God, you're beautiful and smart!"

Sandy giggled. "Ain't you the charmer?"

"So, what do you do for a living?"

"Mainly research. I collect samples of plants and send them up to a lab on land. And sketches and such of the undersea critters."

"Where did you go to school?"

"TSU--- Texas Squirrel University."

"You went to College?" Plankton asked, obviously excited. "I think you're the first college-educated person besides myself IN Bikini Bottom."

"Where'd you go?"

"The University of Kelp Forest."

"Biology major?"

"Biomedical engineering, actually."

"Then why waste your time trying to steal the Krabby Patty secret formula?"

"Do you know how hard it is to find a job as a Biomedical engineer when you're 1/3 the size of the machine you're supposed to be building?"

"But you build all those great robots..."

"That were supposed to be performing operations in the great hospitals." He looked away. "The world isn't cut out for me..."

"So you wanted to cut your place in the world?"

"If by that, you mean 'take it over' then yes."

Sandy and Plankton laughed and drank and talked for the rest of the evening. When it was over, Plankton walked Sandy home. "Well, good night, Sandy Cheeks."

"Good night, Sheldon Plankton."


	3. Chapter 3

One day, Sandy walked into the Krusty Krab.

"Ahoy there, land squirrel!"

"Howdy, Mr. Krabs."

"To what do I owe the fine pleasure of your company?" He kissed her paw. "Ya still gotta order something."

Sandy giggled. "Oh, Eugene… Acturally, I just want 2 Krabby Patty value meals to go."

"Squidward, ring this fine lady up."

"Oh joy of joys. I get to ring up a customer. My life is complete," Squidward said sardonically.

"I love you too, Squiddy." She took her bags and left. "Bye, Squid. Bye, Mr. Krabs. See you later, Spongebob!"

"I wonder why she wanted two," Spongebob said.

"Maybe she was really REALLY hungry," said Squidward. He laughed. "Ha, ha, hahaha. Hungry. Haaaa ha ha ha."

"Maybe she bought one patty for her boyfriend."

Squidward looked back at Spongebob. "A BOYFRIEND?" Squidward had always held a soft spot in his heart for the squirrel, who had been his inspiration for many a nude painting.

Mr. Krabs skittered over, saying, "What's the matter, Tentacles? Wish it was you?"

Eager to regain his composure, Squidward lied: "No. I just always thought she was a lesbian."

"What's a lesbian?"

"A lesbian is someone who likes women."

"Ohhhhh….. so I'm a lesbian?"

Mr. Krabs slapped himself in the head. "What's the feller's name?"

"I think it's something with an 'S'. Samuel, Shamu…"

Squidward gulped. "Squilliam?"

"Yeah, maybe that was it."

"Are you sure?"

"Or maybe it was Sheldon."

Mr. Krabs screamed at the top of his lungs in language so foul I cannot repeat it without changing the rating to "NC-17."

"TELL me it wasn't Sheldon. Tellmeitwasn'tSheldon!"

"Okay, it wasn't Sheldon."

"Oh it was Sheldon!"

"Who's Sheldon?"

"Sheldon is the first name of me arch nemesis!"

"The health inspector?"

"Plankton!"

Spongebob gasped audibly.

Mr. Krabs rushed over to the Chum Bucket, where Sheldon was about to take a big bite of the Krabby Patty. "NOOOOOOO!"

"What? I'm just eating it."

"Ye landlubber! What were ya thinkin' giving me worst enemy a Krabby Patty?"

"It's not like he can tell the secret formula by eatin' it, Eugene."

Plankton shook his head.

"Oh. Well then, don't I feel like an asshole. Carry on!"

They shrugged as Mr. Krabs left, and finished their sandwiches.

"Mmmm…. That hit the spot."

"Sandy, I have something to tell you."

"You're impotent?"

"Yes. I mean no! No. God, it's not like I'm Bob Dole. Sandy, what I'm trying to tell you is: I love you."

Sandy started giggling.

"I didn't think it was THAT funny." He turned and began to walk toward his lab.

"No, Sheldon, wait…." He turned around. "I love you too. More than a slice of Texas sky."


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note: sorry about the wait. I just moved into my dorm recently and haven't had the time to sit down and write lately.

Throughout the next few weeks, Sandy and Sheldon grew closer together, becoming nearly inseperable. It wasn't uncommon for the average Bikini Bottom denizen to see the land mammal carry the coepopod around in the pocket of her underwater suit. Mr. Krabs gritted his teeth and just waited for the opportune moment to launch his attack against Plankton, who was coming closer and closer to the Krabby Patty secret formula, eating so many procured by Sandy. Squidward also gritted his teeth, hoping that Sandy would finally come to her senses.

It was a dark and stormy night when Mr. Krabs put his evil plan into action. He kicked open the door of the Chum Bucket.

"Hello, Sheldon."

Plankton glared. "Eugene. What are you doing here?"

"I been noticing you've been hanging around that little squirrel."

"What's it to ya?"

"Well, I'm sure you'd like to hold her. Or kiss her. Or make love to her."

Plankton looked Mr. Krabs in the eyes. Sure, he wanted to do all these things, but he couldn't let Mr. Krabs see that. "Your point?"

"I hear tell of a Sea Witch who lives on the outskirts of Rock Bottom. They say that she'll grant ye one wish, and this wish can be fer anything in the world. She could turn ye into a squirrel so's you could be with yer girlfriend."

Plankton felt this sounded too good to be true. "What's in it for you to tell me this?"

"I want Sandy to be happy."

"Since when has Sandy's personal happiness been any of your concern, Eugene?"

"Since she's become a VIP customer at the Krusty Krab."

"I don't care about your fairy stories, Krabs. Sandy and I are perfectly happy on our own."

"Suit yerself," Krabs said, leaving. "I'm leavin' a map by the door if yeh change your mind."

Plankton waited a full fifteen minutes until his curiosity got the better of him. "I guess it couldn't hurt. I'm not doing anything tomorrow."

The next morning found Plankton outside the Sea Witch's cave. "Hello?" He ventured into its gaping maw. "Anybody home?"

A Ghastly Greenish Bearded Woman (heretoafter abbreviated as "GGBW") suddenly appeared. "Come in, Sheldon."

"How do you know my name?"

"The Sea Witch knows all, young man."

"Then you know why I'm here."

"You want to be able to better suit your girlfriend."

"And world domination. Don't forget the world domination."

"I can only grant you one wish, my son. Choose: love or power."

Immidiately, Plankton said "Power... no Love. Love. Final Answer: Love."

The GGBW handed him a potion. "This elixir, when drunk, will turn you into a squirrel until midnight."

"Hot damn!" He was about to drink, when he paused. "Wait, I won't be able to breathe underwater."

"A gilled squirrel"

Not finding anything wrong with that logic, Plankton drank the potion deep, and in a poof bubble reminiscent of the Fairly OddParents, Plankton became Sheldon the gilled squirrel.

"You might want these," the Sea Witch said, handing him a pair of board shorts. "You're anatomically correct."

"Thank you, madame Sea Witch!" Sheldon yelled and ran to Sandy's treedome. He knocked on the door.

Sandy opened the door. "Hello?"

"Hello, Sandy."

"Sheldon?"

He grabbed her by the waist and kissed her for the first time. He picked her up, closed the door, and carried her up to her bedroom.


	5. Chapter 5

Sandy snuggled in Sheldon's arms. "That was amazing."

He looked at her. "I love..."

"I love you too..."

"... this body. I have depth perception!"

Sandy was rather surprised by this outburst. "What?"

"With Depth Perception, I could RULE THE WORLD... with you by my side, of course."

"We just had sex, and all you can think about is world domination?"

"I don't know why. I think it's a side effect of the spell. What do you want?"

"I dunno. A little romance?"

"Romance ain't my thing, doll."

"_What did you just call me?_"

"Hold on, honey. It's just the post-orgasmic hormones talking."

"I'll show you post-orgasmic hormones!"

Sheldon ran down the stairs and outside, barely getting his board shorts on before being on the streets of Bikini Bottom. He marched to the Sea Witch's lair.

"You tricked me! You made me even MORE obsessed with power."

"You couldn't choose, Sheldon. So, I chose for you. You can rule the world, if you can give up love."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

The Sea Witch gave Sheldon a knife. "Cut out the heart of the one you love, and I'll let you keep this body forever."

Conflicted by his desires, Sheldon raced back to the treedome. Sandy was on her bed, crying.

Sheldon came up behind her, but as soon as he did, something stopped him from going through with it. He dropped the knife, and sat next to Sandy. "I'm sorry, Sandy. I never want to hurt you."

She looked up at him, and searched his eyes, to find the truth. Sure of his honesty, she kissed him.

Suddenly, outside, the Sea Witch gave a great cry and revealed herself for what she was.

"THE FLYING DUTCHMAN!"

"In drag!" He laughed maniacally.

"Wow, I can't believe we didn't see that coming."

The Flying Dutchman laughed again, and zapped Plankton. He turned back into the little coepopod he had been before. "Now, Plankton, you owe me for granting your wish."

"I knew there was a catch!"

"And the catch is: you've got to work for a hundred years as a member of my ghostly-ghost crew!"

"Oh no!"

"Or, you can just stop trying to get the secret formula to the Krabby Patty."

"Wow. Talk about being caught between a rock and a hard place. And I was SO CLOSE to figuring it out by taste!"

Sandy looked at him. "You lied to me?"

"Well..."

"I can stand getting insulted. I can stand you turning back into a little jellybean. But if there's one thing I CAN'T stand, it's being lied to."

"I can explain."

"Take him on the ship, Mr. Dutchman, sir. He ain't doin' no good here."

"You mean?"

"It's over, Sheldon. I don't ever want to see you again!" she yelled, and flicked him into the Dutchman's hands.


	6. Chapter 6

Author's note: This is kind of an epilogue, leading into the sequel. I'm sorry the story is so short. I'm not cut out for novellas, lol.

A little while later, after everything in Bikini Bottom had calmed back down, Spongebob went to the Treedome to see Sandy.

"Hey, Sandy. I heard about Plankton. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"If you're fine, then why haven't you come out of your house?"

"Spongebob..."

"Okay, but... there's something going on at the Fancy restaraunt tonight. I was hoping you'd be there. It's at 6."

"Spongebob, that's in an hour."

"Then you'd better hurry to get ready," he said and left.

Sandy looked at her reflection in the mirror. It was true--- she hadn't left the treedome for weeks. She'd been feeling ill for the past week, but she hadn't thought anything of it. "Maybe it'll do me some good to get out of the house." She dressed up in her prettiest dress, and her fanciest shoes, and combed and styled her hair in the prettiest way she knew how. She put on her air helmet and walked out. She walked down the main road until she reached the glass bottle with a ship inside it, with the word "Fancy" on the top. She stopped short and sighed. "Well, here goes!" She opened the door.

"SURPRISE!" All of Sandy's Bikini Bottom friends yelled to her as she walked in. She couldn't decide whether to laugh or to cry.

"Thanks, guys. I really needed this after Sheldon and I broke up." Out of nowhere, Pearl took her by the hand and led her to the dance floor, where her true love was waiting to take her hand.


End file.
